An elderly Jewish man faints and is rushed to the nearest hospital. A nurse tucks him into bed and says, “Mr. Schwartzman, are you comfortable?” Schwartzman replies, “I make a living…!”
A priest and a rabbit walk into a blood clinic.
The priest says “I’m a Type-A” and the rabbit says “I’m a typo”
Bernstein walks into work one day at 9. He is very late The boss is furious. “You should have been here at 8:30!” he shouts.
“Why?” says Shapiro. “What happened at 8:30?”
Schwartz is sitting in his room, wearing only a top hat, when Steinberg strolls in.
“Why are you sitting here wearing no clothing?”
“It’s all right,” says Schwartz. “Nobody comes to visit.”
“But why the hat?”
“Maybe somebody will come.”